wide-eyed at 4am

Pre-Opp Day: June 29

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This day wore me out for some reason. Maybe the morning run, errands, a couple of hours of work and the 2 pm pre-opp appointment did it. Especially that last part. It seems that my appointment days are more tiresome and draining. Mostly the stress because the appointments really aren’t lengthy.

It could also be that this is the last step before surgery. Maybe that got under my skin.

Vitals have never really made me nervous before. But since Diagnosis Day, my blood pressure has been slightly elevated so each time it’s taken, I worry that whoever is taking it won’t like the numbers and that it will carry some consequences that could delay the surgery. And that just can’t happen. This has to happen on schedule. But apparently my slightly elevated level isn’t disconcerting – considering my predicament.

Oh – I got sidetracked. Back to the pre-opp process. Consult with pharmacy and with anesthesiology as well as an EKG. This is the first EKG I’ve had. And apparently it “was perfect.” Then the blood work.

The entire process took about 1.5 hours but it seemed longer with the waiting between “activities” and all.

Waiting is the culprit again. Hmmmm. Seems to be the main storyline here, doesn’t it? Whether for results or for the next needle stick, probing exam or consultation, it seems that most of my time is spent waiting. And waiting means lots of time for thinking when the imagination can go amuck.

The waiting isn’t even close to over, even though surgery is approaching. The biggest wait will be after my “cut-time” and initial surgery recovery has passed.

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Author: jillpurdy

A few months ago I wasn't but now I'm a statistic. That doesn't define me. I'm a daughter, a sister, a wife, a step mom, a grandmother, a friend and a Christian. I will continue to love exercise, music, cooking and food, and my family and friends. I'm stubborn, energetic, giving and too OCD for my own good sometimes. And I'm going to stay this way - despite cancer and the treatments that it takes to give it the royal beatdown.

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